"Reflections"

"Reflections"

will the world be a better place without me...?

people i love are hurt along the way...,
i witness the agony with my own vision.
i feel the stab too
either half or double the ache, i know not...,

Ironically it was me who hurt them.
funny how i was the source of their emotional turbulence.
eventually contributed to a devastatingly high scores
outnumbering individuals who can still smile genuinely at me.

Regardless of what I do.
I try too hard sometimes, to set everything in equilibrium.
And I am being too hard on myself.
sorry never sizzles the fire of hatred.
onli guilt serves the purpose of living.

i please and i displease,
i love and hate,
i come and leave,
i bulid and i demolish,
i horrify and i satisfy,
i am a friend and i am a foe.

i am impatient but i withstand...

i am happy and i am gloomy...
i tear and I smile.

i am scared and i am strong.
i fear and i dont doubt
i care and i am nasty

i am sulin and i am not myself
i am her...
Her...the person i see in the mirror everyday
downside up, outside in
the world is the actual reflection.
the surreal is the real.
what i see is what she dreams

I only survive thinking i was not a bogus
I live in between two mirrors...
in which i see many hers...
each one think the rest are images

Strangely...,
I am "ME" for every she....

note: as kai puts it- the title is pun intended.

Only Love,
Su-Lin Tan (o3.44am)
-another piece of Suemoness-