Currently listening to RBD-Tu Armor

"With great power comes a greater responsibility"

sounds familiar? Of course! Its depicted from the mutated dude who wears red-blue cobwebbed suit who flung himself around in the city.

Bah! Thats not the point.

As usual, I enjoy deviating from the main course.
Wonder when will I get lost and start following the map using an appropriate compass.
*here i go again*

"With great attention, comes a greater hollowness to be filled"

I'm beginning to suspect of my own doing. Talk about the devil in me eh...
It is time like this that you can't help where are those who you really call friends fair-weathered foes...
About seeing things in a more optimistic perspective, it just doesn't apply in every situational dilemma.

People do not care. People act like they don't. I act like that too. But deep down, residing in one corner of my pouch of emotion... its struggling hard to stay calm... With every beat, it grows a lil' more feeding on the loneliness, doubts that haunt the owner.

How come only I feel this way? Why do I have to expect so much from friends? I hate myself for feeling this way yet I cannot find any solution to this predicament. I tried telling myself, they do not appreciate me as much as I appreciate them. I am nowhere significant in their life just as much as how much I prioritize them. Shows how much I am fond of them and in return, instead of getting the same treatment, I get the I-dont-care-what-shithole-you-drop-into attitude.

This isn't justice I am ranting about. Friendship comes with extra complimentary good that the receiver does not need to ask for or work for. Too bad, its human weakness to hope for the same thing she feels for. It is only normal. Only consolation I can resort to... What else can I do? Throw tantrum at them? Show them the right way they should treat a friend of a different gender?

It is alwayz me who finally have to give in. I give my best shot by making it easy for them. I act, I behave, I talk, I laugh like a male to a certain level. But reality doesnt alter the nature's course that I think, feel and has a heart of a fragile lady... It beats me badly whenever I think about this matter. It makes me feel so weak and useless.

*sigh..* Has been happening for a bit. Maybe I should just immunized myself with it.
Makes life so much less complicated.