-3 in 1-

-3 in 1-


I was really excited to get back from library, wanting to flop down in front of my laptop and start blogging... but since ive been delayed it, neh.. the inspiration has subsided to a normal level...

->d' 3 elements: HOPE(sparks)... ANGER(fire)... REGRETS(ashes)....
->Philosohically: the birth.. the rise... and the fall of a Phoenix.... (a sexy one!)

Anyways...., 3 things that I wanted jot down:
1) before i start... *pat pat own's head* i was beaming a few minutes back! i have never been so proud with myself for a very long time for accomplishing the impossible... (i wasnt even this satisfied after singing on stage at KMC greens in front of hundreds of spectators for one of the biggest anual event in Manipal-LAGENDA... on the 17th of december! gosh! i was so freaked out when i first knew about how huge that whole function was gonna be! I presented on a stage facing towards a vast outlook of green and well trimmed field occupied with uncountable number of audience-students and locals around manipal.....Had alwayz been the audience... And whenever i watched ppl my age perform, the voice from the depth starts pestering me and annoyed me for not having the guts to do it! Not anymore! An achievement is an achievement! I overcome my stage fright at last and i sang! I PERFORM! A DREAM I never have thought would ever came true.... it was a great feeling.... really.... ) So today, another record breaking task ive managed is officially calling myself a Medical student aka NERD! I sat for 5! FIVE! LIMA! Wu! GOR! ANJE! continuos hours studying! For once! Hurray! Hurray! hurray hu holiday! AHAHHAHAHAHA! And i am talking about sitting and not even budging to go out for dinner and not even TOILET! funny thing... nature didnt make it's call... lolz! ANYWAYZ, im really overjoyed! PROUD and contended are the more precise vocab to describe my feeling right now!

::ahaha.. who would have guessed...?::

2) Coming to point (dont prepare to yawn coz dis is definitely the total opposite tone compared to the above...) "What goes up will come down..." Ever heard of karma...? I bet u noe! and no, im not talkin about kama sutra u silly! yeah! AND SO! MY FREAKING INTERNET.BROADBAND BILL FOR A MONTH is.......... JENG JENG JENG!!!!! RM 480!!!!!! WAT DA FUCKING FUCK MAN???? Wifey's bill is RM1000!!!!! We almost got cardiac arrest, circulatory shock, concussion all in ONE staring at those faded numbers printed on the pathetic white sheet of invoice stamped BSNL.... Worse still... the ink used was lousy..., greyish.. and YET THE IMPACT WAS WAY BEYOND EXPRESSIONS!! DAMN INDIA! FUCK INDIA! (no, im not gonna fuck it, someone else has too.... im sorry.. thousand and one apology for my ever so-called wonderful and "polite" readers! i noe im usin a lot a lot of indecent word and im reffering to Harryz wif the 'Z' at the back! but it is MY BLOG, so it is MY WISH.... ) Oh lord! i expected indians to be a failure in business after watching Russel Peter! ANd no dude! INDIANS aka tempe aka RI-short form for resident indian here prove me sooo wrong! Coz they outsmart us wif their fake guts! Hokkien we say: Kelenga teeih! DAMN IT! EVEN INDIA's ants have to cari pasal with me! for the past few days, i have been stomping and smacking every ants in sight! NO JOKE! TiCKED me off to the max!

3) Is new year going to be promising...? or will fate brings me to a destination i have not expected....? will i live in regrets...? and swallow the perplexed emotions im dealing with right now.... I behave like a two different person at daylight and in nightlife.... Am i a morning person or am i a noctural? But no... this is harder than i thought... Its so messed up! IT IS! IT IS! IT IS! The only thing that keep me moving and distracting me is studies for the will to want to score well is really overwhelming! of coz any normal person would felt this way... especially me... The reputation as a bright student is filthty now! Im disgusted and im ashamed at my own performance... Call me a kiasu! Call me a perfectionist! YES I AM! I did so well for CPU and medicine juz make me feel timid.... Firstly because im sitting wif a helluva smart arse named jiun kit! ARGH! but hes nice, been helping me alot... sigh.... secondly, i almost failed my two class tests! Anywaz... i think i have deviated alot from my suposedly emo...paragraph.... What should i do...? What do i do...? The end of 2005 does not hold an answer for me.... I guess.... journey in search of my missing soul has to commence right away....

-ADIOS 2005-

`~What an attitude towards 2006~`

`~What an attitude towards 2006~`

In no time... wishes will be heard welcoming a bright brand new year... But have we ever say goodbye to 2005? No doubt anticipating 2006 indirectly send across a message of adios to 2005, but to think of it deep enough... u will manage to make out the thin strand of line seperating the goodbye and the welcome of something new at the same time...

No one will want to mourn over the past because it is a known concept to think positive... No-regrets principle is brought about and is instilled and yada..yada..yada... Aha! I can tell the world that im not in my pleasant mood for the past few days. In another word- FOUL! So, aura of melancholiness has found its way to entertain me and reciprocally I somehow find it rather amusing to dwell in the darkness.... *SULK*

2 days to new year, yet I failed to establish "THE MOOD" the least i had for christmas... wonder why not for new year? Blaming it on my presence in India doesnt suite me: self esteem aint that low. Blaming India itself seems to be too generalized and abstract because I foresee this situation like a few months back before coming to India..... I knew for a fact that I will not ever get bangsar's, klcc's, star walk's and not even a dataran merdeka's atmosphere in Manipal... But hell, i do hope for a change...!! Secretly I do want a better estatic celebration! DUH~! Every teen like me will die for an extravaganza event unless I am labelled "Hilton, Chaurasia... or even something close to "chihuahua" and "simcard" (gosh, i hate not having the freedom to type ppl's name in my own blog! Too public!!!)

Basically, i feel empty... Ever come across these feelings?
"Floating in space of darkness...silence...blankness... and being swayed by mild breeze without any sense of direction.Only guide is the changing course of wind...(if u get what i mean...) Washed by curent of thoughts towards the door of doomed (more of boredom...)
Feeling hollow from the very top of my cranial cavity all the way down to stomache. Im totally drained lar...As if all the happiness and joy has been sucked out from your soul..."

Either from lack of sleep which i highly doubt or rather has been concentrating hard on studies. Half of my feet has entered the nerdy zone ya noe? Sooner... you shall see a bespectacled sulin going everywhere with a thick medical book pressed on her sagging boobs, apearance: slouching, dressed in collared check-boxed huge blouse... Looking ever so goofy! Seriously i wont be surprised... We call this self evolution... Eventhough evolution happens over centuries but this particular changes does not follow Darwin's Theory. Rapid evolution theory introduced by SuLin the Geek! Then i will never be sexy anymore... Then i will never be the hot chick anymore.... *sigh... sigh.... sigh.....*

And no I dont even have a resolution...! -Pathetic- Not like my resolutions are listed down to be followed.. but for the sake and fun of squeezing them reso from my brain cells... Then pompously state that "neh... i never kept mine too..." Muahaha~ Well, all that are no longer in trend here. On the other hand, we the nerds only chant... "we..do..not...have...r..e..s..o..l..u..t..i..o..n... and we do not need one...........................*yawns*

*SMACK! combo of backflip DDTC!*
gosh.... get A LIFE and get alive DUDE AND DUDETTES!!!
wait for my next entry about : The Regrets of 2005 instead of Resolutions of 2006
(since every Tom, Dick and Harry or every Susan, Sue and Sally write about resolutions!)

.........thufffff.................

~JoLLy and SiLLy

~JoLLY and Silly~

Heres some lame modified version of christmas songs in conjuction to the end of 2005 christmas:
-Jingle bell.. Jingle bell.. Jingle down the drain... Juggle everyone's balls!
-Silent night.. holy night... lustful night...
-Dis is season to be SILLY! Shalalalalalalala~

:: Spot me in santa hat~! ::

::the limited edition of santa's helpers::

::parading outside lecture hall (no wonder ppl were staring at us like a bunch of morons::

The eve's was great... =) spending time with the love ones is the sweetest comfort u can get here... Obviously i dun have my family here (anwayz, not like my family will celebrate christmas, screwed up family yet i LOVE each and everyone of dem! HEHEHE) So us, ie: me, mel, dailou, enghan+ alicia, amanda and sonam made our way to saif parivar- a more decent proper restaurant in Udupi (a town located in the vicinity of manipal) It will only take 15 minutes IF the oto driver has the brain or the guts to accelerate and risk our life but yesterday we had to come across the first ever so careful driver that tested our patience!!!! ARGH!? Me and mel were late...as usual... Since when are we punctual? Gosh, really, i personally think our future boyfren is gonna suffer.. thufff~ Another uninteresting event to mention, we forced dailou outta his bed to come wif us. recently, he has been damn anti-social. we even planned on buyin the lunch buffet today without asking him beforehand!

Anywaz, i spent half of our dinner time standing outside the balcony of the restaurant to make phone calls all the way back to malaysia. first i only wanted to call kukucheh and chris and sugit coz they are like christians! lolz but i ended up calling the rest of my family! cudnt get my dad thou~ Shereen and d' geng ate at blue water *sob sob...*

::need i say more....? (before dinner)::

Right after dinner, we took oto back to manipal! WOHOO! HIT THE CLUB TIME!!!! AND DRINKING TIME!!!! 1/4 of my whole class (total: 130) were there! COOL! and my batch was dominating the dance floor! lolz... ALOT OF DEM were freaking tipsy and drunk-came out wif unimaginable stunts! dailou told us he saw ppl throw bottles at other before in club but not throwing friends... *sigh...* yup, dat was one of the highlight! damn! Lee almost broke his damn neck man! falling from a height as high as enghan! But it was way cool! Meet shereen there. didnt get a chance to drink with her thou. Well... i will make sure new year we are gonna enjoy together!

Oh yeah! i forgot to mention! i love my dressing for the past two days. me looked like santa's sexy lil helper!! The eve's and christmas day, dresscode was damn christmassy despite the fact that i was wearing black on saturday-wanna potray a black christmas lar konon..! me and wifey bought santa hat and were wearing dat to almost everywhere we went! and those indians were staring at us like two morons on the loose!!! HAHAHHA! Untill a point,we were shouting merry christmas to everyone we saw on the street. ...not to mention wavings....

::within the arms of giants from batch 16!!! tell me about being tall, i look like a midget here! Aaaaaaa~ (from left-marcus,dheeraj,pashvin, hussein wif his weird bell nails, navin(pseudo bro-in-law,hehe) and last but not the least HARRYZZZZZ!::

::constipated look::

::lunch buffet which cost me freakin 333rs for lousy meal::

Memento in memorandum~

Memento in memorandum~


You know...? sometimes when u are just too disturbed and your brain becomes too saturated to even brood over every single irritating and annoying recent incidents that have been happening in your life... All u want to do is, point your bloody finger at everything or everybody else and start blaming them?

Yes dear...I am having this damn syndrome right now! I juz stepped into the library not long ago- was about 10 minutes back… placed my ever bulky books on the table... down... got comfortable... took out my papers, notes and pen when I NOE THERE IS SOMETHING AT THE BACK OF MY FREAKING MIND that is distracting me...even till this moment!) I have been thinking about this matter again and again and again (repeating it till outta breath...) throughout the short walking distance from my lovely comfy room to the library...Mentang mentang lar room cannot study and library can... SEE WHAT happens now??? I do not freaking noe wat I want! I really do not noe!!! series of interesting events are happening in my life lately… INFACT QUITE! and they are getting more and more annoying one after another!

Thus, I am here in the library’s comp lab and im actually paying 10 rupees to blog! I cant stop my sudden urge to blog! To tell the whole world my feelings! Actually not.. but yeah... I strongly feel like expressing myself... I do...

ME, MYSELF AND I!!!!! ARGHHHHH~ Prony..., im feeling quite miserable... studies not goin well... dats minority! The major thing is I am missing someone badly back in Malaysia... I really have no idea as of how my feelings brought me there... Since yesterday, I have been thinking about IT! Thinking about how messed up my situation in my hand now... I do feel like tearing, I feel like shouting and screaming with full force at the top of the mountain! I do wana turn back time and let moments replay... I don’t wanna hang on to memory...It kills...
"Wouldnt it be wonderful to let time brings me back to childhood... safely and soundly cuddling under the warmth and protection of my mum... far far away from any tight spots…" In malay we call it “Kerunsingan” I pray that this "thing" is temporary... I pray that im just in my usually lost,indecisive, dellusional thought....

But then again... Who am i to hope now...?

No divine tears can clear a murky situation like this... No prayers can make amendment to a sin i think i have committed... No consolation can feed a beast who is hungry for answers.... Am i this bad..? Why do people need to lose something for them to learn how to be apreciative..? I regret... I regret... I regret... Regret for behaving the way i never wished to be.... Regret for hurting so many people... people whom i noe i can never have back even in my next life... (coz a person like me does not deserve them... ) I regret for not voicing up... i regret for jumping into stuff. (ive alwayz tot i have been a very indecisive soul.. but i had to be extra fast in particularly one matter... a decision which is changing my destiny... as such i have tried rescueing but i have a strong evil feeling that my strength isnt strong enough to support the predicted catastrophe follwing up... i smell tinge of broken promises... i sense the scary numbers of heart that is going to be scraped and scarred... the pumping device known mechanically and medically but a mysterious pouch of emotion.. the one and only which can be wounded by words... wound that never healed.... A teritory with unknown translation of emotions... in which the rise and fall of anyone depends on it... Something that we fail to comprehend... But what else is the truth.....?

Reports: Agent Sue
Case: Unsolved
Comment: The truth is out there (LABELLED: THE X-FILES.......)

Euthopia!

Euthopia!





WOHHOO!!!! I FEEL DAMN GOOD NOW! I FEEL DAMN DAMN DAMN DAMN GOOD! AND I DUN FREAKING care if the world split into two right now! As long as i am alive and everyone else is... thufff~ (err... den it matters afterall.. but dats not the point! )

The best thing in life is dealing with what I treasure! Wat i believe! and its BETTER den best if someone else thinks just like ME! or at least approved of wat i have to say!

Who cares about commitment!? Right now i dun! maybe a few minutes later i do. BUT its wat i feel dat matters now!
Anyways, just wanted to take this opportunity to say I LOVE U BEBE!!!!!!!!!
We fight like theres no end to everything yet we can yap grandma's stories (grinsss~~~~) for freaking 2 hrs and that would have continued if we werent having time constraint. =)
*winks winks*

I never knew I have missed out so much of impressive changes in u! And learning so much about us in 2 hrs??? LAUGH OUT DAMN LOUD! *Biggg Bigg HUGSZZZZ*

KUDDOS for the both of us!!!

I HATE THE WORLD!

I HATE THE WORLD!

FUCK THE WHOLE WORLD!!!!

EVERYONE IN IT AND EVERY SINGLE THING!!!!
I AM BEING EXTREMELY SENSITIVE FOR DIS PAST FEW DAYS and I AM GONNA SCREW IT! COZ I AM GONNA BE LIKE DIS FOR THE NEXT FEW DAYS!!!!!

NEURO FURRY! ALL DIS IS TOO MUCH! I WISH I HAVE A TIMER OR A CONTROLER IN WITHIN MY GRASP SO I CAN HALT EVERY MOVEMNT! AND LET ME BE THE ONLI one MOVing!

I AM SICK OF BEING TOO NICE! IM SICK OF DISAPOINTING THE ONES I LOVE! I AM SICK OF HAVING TO PRETEND! I AM SICK OF MAKING MY GOOD FRENS , girls and guys included feeling shitty! ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

WHY DO I FEEL SO INSECURE! WHY DO I LOVE THNKING NONSENSE??? WHY DO I LOVE USIN WHY???????

~mushroom and tomato~

~mushroom and tomato~

elizabeth - went on a shopping spree says:
"how mess up can u be....u r su lin"

Trust me, i can be really screwed up sometimes... until the level in which it never strucked me that i was SCREWED! Today is a good example... A lesson to be learnt... An enlightenment i have earned... A joy to be celebrated... AND A LOVE I SHOULD SHIELD...

For the darkest, most appalling moment... I thought that I, Su-Lin... (the girl who is alwayz proud at the way her life caught her into tight situations, coping well in untangling up certain hard to sort predicament and managing what seems like an impossible now...) failed to lead the almost perfect life by making a huge mistake. A mistake i thought i can never traced back the origin and find the remedy for it. I had to be greatly disturbed with one simple question/statement. "Are u playing?" HUH?! That question struck me like a thunderbolt eh! No JOKE! Sigh.. refering to my nickname on msn a few weeks back : HIDE and SEEK, i think that is the game i am playin now....

I am hiding from reality and yet venture out seeking for an answer which is already in front of me... I know i have A LOT of things to learn... I have a long long list of goals clearly and ambigiously carved in my brain to be crossed out and express : YIPEE! Also rectify my many anonymous behaviour i am yet to discover! But getting something ive alwayz wanted (yes, it is hard to believe) and sorta devoting myself in it is like buying a sure gain 4D number! So, now! I AM CONVINCED that i was wrong for thinking so~~~ I have ponder really hard...

I think i was merely confused... Aint ready to step into a totally whole new world... Experiencing an entire new phase of my ever so complicated life (and no, i dun mean medicine course u doofus-donkey in shereen's language) Apart from that... succesfully letting go of something like a false, one sided hopr and affection for pig was not what i had in my schedule in the near future. There i was blindly and foolishly telling a lie to myself that things between me and him wasnt really wat it was supposed to be. giving myself the silliest excuse i conjured...Thuffff~ Guess, i will never know for a fact about how my past went wif him. Coz he sux in being someone who failed me too many times. AT LEAST TELL me LAR idiot! Of course i will move on and be happy for u! AT least i dun have to feel so stoopid now! (errrr... two weeks back) Thus, i take it as, u NEVER consider me as ur fren! HMMPPHH~

seriously... i have feared that this whole thing is a rebound... A way to channel my grief by falling into someone's outstretch arms... Great job mushie... U really proved me wrong... *winks* A story of tomatoes of mushnrooms... is yet to be completed... And i shall paint it too... Just you see...

P/s: saturday anual dinner was a magnificent night!
1) I wore sari for the first time WOOTTTT!!!



2) kevin su (still my eyecandy but onli eyecandy) LOLZ! came and asked me for a pic together! Man i was flattered!




3) Went clubbing in sari! never felt better on the dance floor! Not even in miniskirt and those lovely tops. ^-^


4) last but not the least, jeng jeng jeng! The beauty paegent princesses~ HEHE!

Deprived~"Pisces" Vs. Leo (pun-intended)

Deprived~"Pisces" Vs. Leo (pun-intended)

YEAP! First Malpey. Now this! I cant believe it! I CANT!

DEPRIVED! YES i am! DOH~ Having to wake up after sleeping off in a throbing headache and directly being enlightened with the news that U are YET again being ticked off or rather forgotten or left out or watever shit u call it, isnt at all that pleasant...IN fact it was shitty! maybe, i wasnt even included in the list.


Being labelled SHOPAholic when all i did was last minute shop for ANUAL NIGHT attire, bangles for ANNUAL NIGHT and tika or ANNUAL NIGHT dinner! Thfff~ Very REASONABLE indeed. So, i wudnt be surprised if someone call me a shopping freak and a shopping obessed when i run my normal megasale shopping in a proper mall next time!

What am i asking for? At least an sms would have done the magic! At least i know you(plural,referring to all) care to inform EVENTHOUGH you noe i am a freaking pig that fail to get up once i knock out. At least i dont feel so left out when i get to know that u actually send a msg telling me u guys are off to ur happily-originally-suposedly-cancelled dinner at udupi!

I didnt say I wasnt interested! WATS wif the assumption and presumption wanabe suddenly? How can u guys assume that i will not be interested for a good dinner? How can u presume that I AM not into things like dis?! JUz becoz and all in the name of blame on the AssumPTION of i was in udupi like for half a day walking under the hot sun finding for proper last minute ANNUAL DINNER ATTIRE! When everyone has got their stuff sewn or at least has sent it to the taylors! Hearing them brag about this sari, and dat suite and bla bla bla...And wHen i said i have Zero (mind me, I seriously and completely have zero proper costume to wear if i were not to go to UDUPI today!!!!) As it is, I feel so unwanted and inexhilarated about going to the annual dinner. all thanks to the so-not-sporting friends! Now, i am gonna show dem. however i will show. Will think about dis later! damn it! As far as i am concern, i didnt say NO for an answer about the dinner. I even checked my conversation history to see whether i might have implied it off handedly, BUT NO, i didnt!

Back to the whole mess! Me being the middle person, yes, and someone who alwayz try to please both parties, i definitely do feel bad if i dun attend a birthday bash i was called to. Of course i would have gladly gone there alone if i was the onli one invited and NOT being told to pass the msg to ppl "AROUND" me. I would gladly went there myself and feel less bad for forcing it down ppl's throat about attending the thing! Sometimes, u juz have to be obliged to things. Sacrificing sometimes wont do any harm! at least show ur dumb face and pretend to be happy. Think of it dis way, wont u want more ppl to come if u are being surprised? Its juz the feel and adding on to the atmosphere afterall. Probably my presence here might be insignificant at all cost but I do noe, it does make A difference. It is the the PR. Though I noe some ppl juz dun give two fucks about the amount of ppl and onli care about the quality of ppl presence. So wat? That is juz U! I CARE! and i noe how it feels like! For god sake, wat do u expect? u want it ur way, have it ur way? den dont fear of being an outcast. why fear for something u dun belif in??? U want something, U dun juz get it! U earn it! Its alwayz the law of society. Wanna make a difference? Then use a way where everyone is capable of accepting it! changes comes slowly, not abruptly.

Good enough, im freaking hungry now after a whole stretch of being angry and looking at my sullen in the mirror! God, i was deprived! Now, i just gotta learn to be a loner and feed on my own miserable thoughts. Yeap, shoot me! I quinch my thirst for attention by gambling by own shower of joy! Being pleasant can be annoying sumtimes, but the pay off in my view is more than i can ask for. Because, these are the things I set for myself in life. And i alwayz ended up getting the things i've wanted. So, am dead or wat that i am stuck in between layers of relationship coercion and being the me, my friends would have expected? Sorry, my way is no way if u cant seem to look and at least try to understand how my way works.

But whatever it is, there is NO excuse for temporarily disregarding the feelings of a fren, underestimating the impact a leftout friend might feel , overlook the need of friend to share and enjoy, and most importantly ASSUME AND PRESUME. Especially when u are NOT dealing wif Hi-Bye frieds or friend u are reluctant to attned a birthday bash for! Just put urself in my shoe.

Beyond comprehension.. Is dis wat life is all about..?

Beyond comprehension.. Is dis wat life is all about..?


I see.... I feel... I hear... I sense... I believe... Then I question... And i doubt....

Sometimes...when ur pal seemed disturbed, will it ever affect you? Telling you that he just doesn't seem to have a pleasant intuition... Thus u start pondering, you fall straight into a loop of questionaire till you get a justified answer to suite your thoughts or plaster the leakage of principle which happened over a tick of second...

I have questioned myself before... Not once, not twice, not millions of time... but the rare moment that struck me hard from time to time is sufficient to replenish the need to want to know the life after death...? purpose of life...? who are we...? why us? destiny? karma? how far our galaxy extends...? why is bermuda traingle behaving this way...?

and this will persist onto rather silly thoughts, wild imaginations that i cant seem to comprehend... are there giants somewhere else in the galaxy? is our milky way juz a dust particle of another world? and dat another world is just a minute sand together with zillions of the same worlds within more internal worlds collectively form a whole new larger world? wat da fuck???

HAHAHAH! I KNOW it. People who want to try understand and outsmart the limited explanation by creating theories (which i am referring to myself indirectly) are just finding for problem. In cantonese: taak han mou si chou, kau si. Direct translation: too free nothing to do, find for problem. I have answer to all the unexplainable phenomena.... HOW?

Just by being plain dumb. Believe in paradoxes.... (again, wat is beliefs...? a channel to seek for solace~)

"Life is simple yet complicated"

Needless to unearth mystery of the world... mystery of life... leading a life which u are contended should be the key to happiness... ITS MY LIFE! and i direct it! i paint my own path and passages of life... DO wat i want today! (i shall make no comment about not regretting it thou) And do NOT give two fucks about people whom trampled upon your esteem. but then again.. without those ppl, u wouldnt noe wat is pride then. without ppl who made u sad.. u woludnt noe wat happiness really is...

Conclusion: it alwayz comes back to one thing: Yin & Yang