Shadow of the yesteryears...

I half suspect i am going crazy...

For i tear one moment and then smile in another instance at the thoughts of making this life changing decision...

Well sulin, asylum is not so far away...

Emancipation...

I spoke about this feeling once, not so long ago...

During my study break...

It was a different definition back then...

Perhaps the same feelings...? *shrugs....*

But....,Is this truly the feeling that is attached with a different kind of soaring?

I feel lifted and free when i leave behind a comfort zone yet i know i left behind something very precious...

After all, it is this cocoon that has been providing me a safe sanctuary and also had aided me to reflect all sorts of vulnerabilities the past 4 years...

Currently...

'Future' is the missing word in my dictionary...

I feel hollow, bleak and scared within...

True enough, I have missed my old self...

Because i have been constantly and inadvertently searched for that missing piece of her in these past few years...

And honestly, relocating her makes me feel at peace...

I was under a mislead impression that people change and so do i...

Hence, i convinced myself again and again that she no longer exists,

Guessing i was wrong all these while...

Little did i know I have been yearning to merge back with her...

The me, who enjoys taking a toe-dip depth into that pool of emotions

or maybe drown herself in ripples of thoughts once in a while...

The Sulin who attends to her pouch of emotions, keeping herself in check...

I am sorry i have kept you waited so long...

I am sorry if i have torn a part you away from me..

I swear it was unintentional...

For I am back now and i will not let go of you anymore...

Shadow of my yesteryears casted upon a new torso from the new dawn...

I am glad it still fits... =)

Signing off,

serenity 10:58am