i am having tough times understanding myself...
still trying to figure out why i have been behaving these ways lately?
how am i going to explain when i do not even know the slightest of the reason?
if i dig hard enough through the cracks of my kidneys...
the answer that came jumping at me is that, this is entirely based on feelings
hence the existence of an answer through my kidneys is pretty much ZERO
how the fuck can i find an answer there when only feelings are involved?
i think i am ignoring my kidneys at the moment
there is no right and wrong
no room for discussions
no space to behave like an adult
i fucking want to be a kid badly like RIGHT NOW!
suck on adick lollipop and not feel shy about it *rolls eyes*
jump on top of the opposite sex and not afraid of what the world might think of me
cry as i like and not be judged
throw tantrums and everyone will be at my feet wtf.wtf.
oh well, fucking grow up already TAN SU-fuckin-LIN
fuckin geddit that you have passed that age.
you have had your time in those years? like duh~
how about this theory?
...it feels so heavy inside
as though i am carrying weights of the entire world upon my shoulder
that i am feeling the pain of all the famine and maltapetaka people
NOT.wtf
*clears throat*
i so am fucking aware about the pettiness of all the matters involved
also the superficial part of it
but yet it perpetuated into some kind of emotional breakdown
every single time without FAIL
never really feel so sad in my entire life for not failing. fwt.
which then placed me in a position easily questioned by many less thoughtful people
now what i am trying to comprehend is why am i heading that direction knowing i'm gonna hit a dead end eventually?
purposeful or following my heart?
meant to be or not meant to be?
testing out the possibilities or stretching the patience margin?
hurt or ego?
thrashed or challenged?
revoked or provoked?
ultimately is it love or hate...?
still trying to figure out why i have been behaving these ways lately?
how am i going to explain when i do not even know the slightest of the reason?
if i dig hard enough through the cracks of my kidneys...
the answer that came jumping at me is that, this is entirely based on feelings
hence the existence of an answer through my kidneys is pretty much ZERO
how the fuck can i find an answer there when only feelings are involved?
i think i am ignoring my kidneys at the moment
there is no right and wrong
no room for discussions
no space to behave like an adult
i fucking want to be a kid badly like RIGHT NOW!
suck on a
jump on top of the opposite sex and not afraid of what the world might think of me
cry as i like and not be judged
throw tantrums and everyone will be at my feet wtf.wtf.
oh well, fucking grow up already TAN SU-fuckin-LIN
fuckin geddit that you have passed that age.
you have had your time in those years? like duh~
how about this theory?
...it feels so heavy inside
as though i am carrying weights of the entire world upon my shoulder
that i am feeling the pain of all the famine and maltapetaka people
NOT.wtf
*clears throat*
i so am fucking aware about the pettiness of all the matters involved
also the superficial part of it
but yet it perpetuated into some kind of emotional breakdown
every single time without FAIL
never really feel so sad in my entire life for not failing. fwt.
which then placed me in a position easily questioned by many less thoughtful people
now what i am trying to comprehend is why am i heading that direction knowing i'm gonna hit a dead end eventually?
purposeful or following my heart?
meant to be or not meant to be?
testing out the possibilities or stretching the patience margin?
hurt or ego?
thrashed or challenged?
revoked or provoked?
ultimately is it love or hate...?
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