watashiwa slept of feeling all sorts of unsatisfactory vibes ie:
-violated
- being used
- dumb
- silly
- short fused
- taken for granted

but watashiwa woke up feeling those were so unreal and not parallel to my expectations.
wonders how much moodiness can alter one's perceptions towards a certain issue.
also wonders if that is the closest most genuine heartfelt shit that is going through in me. But just because i have always been able to put up with emotional attacks, i tend to overlook how they have maimed me. Only to realise those wounds when i let my guard down...

Life sucks in my humble opinion. FARK YOU! 

familiar echoes...

Hank: I know tonight kinda got a little ruined


Becca: It's okay, i'm used to it


Hank: I'll make it up to you, i swear...


Becca: I know


Hank: Do you?


Becca: Sure. You never mean to let me down, but you do...


Hank: Yeahh i guess i do...


Becca: You, know... 
Its all well and good to talk about happy endings..., but if a person can't deliver..., if he keeps screwing up...
Well, eventually i guess i kinda just have to say fuck you, or words to that effect...


(Californication S01E07) 

This episode and especially this conversation sounds eerily familiar...
For this past one week, i have been encountering a lot of these weird-life-is-a-karma-lesson. Quite a challenge to taste my very own bitter medicine not once but twice.

True enough i went through halfway hell but overall i think it was worth the ride.
I feel much better and lighter, after venting those issues close to heart to the person close to my heart.
Am also very glad that I finally heard the consolation words i never thought i would be hearing.
Resolving issues that were bothering me for the longest time.

As much as i like where this is heading, the whole perfect idea still creeps me out. Too ideal for me to handle in this realistic world. Plus, this whole thing also feels too good to be true. I am a strong believer that nothing good will eventually come out from a great start.
Common la..., since when everything seems to fit the puzzles so well. Since when everything seems to snuggly fall into places. And since when wishes are being granted so easily?
Snow white would never ever get her prince charming if she hadn't chocked on apple.

Any fucking way, all i know for now is..., i am bloody well thankful and happy that our path crossed and is still crossing...
Happy Valentines Munks, eventhough i know we both are anti-vday people. Lol.